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Oh, for fuck's sake!
Mar. 4th, 2005 04:32 pmIt's rant-time.
Someone explain it to me. EXPLAIN TO ME why the hell companies feel compelled to package their goods in that heavy-duty plastic packaging that is hermetically sealed, inflexible as lead, able to withstand the assault of anything short of a flamethrower, and requires fifteen to twenty minutes' application of the largest, sturdiest pair of scissors in your house to actually get to the item you have purchased. Generally, wounding yourself in the process, because the edge of the stuff is SHARP AS SHIT when you've actually managed to cut through it.
Every time I have to hack my way into one of these packages, I renew my resolve to track down the person responsible for this idea and shoot him in the head fifty times. Or better yet, lock him in a room filled with canteens of water and dried rations to sustain him... all of them SEALED AWAY IN THE DAMN PLASTIC. I would not give him scissors. A pocket-knife, maybe. It would prolong his suffering.
I mean, honestly, people. In a world where we're polluting the air, the water, and the land, do we really need to be churning out this crap? The packaging probably costs more than the product, it certainly takes up more landfill space, and here's the real kicker: EVERYONE HATES IT.
Now, I consider myself a fairly understanding environmentalist. I get the fact that we don't really have much of a case for telling people they can't cut down the rain forests, when they're doing it because if they don't, their family will starve. I appreciate that a lot of the eutrophication of our waters is because we're dumping fertilizer into the soil to support our agriculture, and that we're exporting food that keeps other people alive. I'll stand behind the mass-production of plastics for syringes and hospital tubes and things that keep our medical system going. And, hey--you don't see me out there trying to commit mass genocide, even though the best possible thing that could happen to the planet, realistically, is if we wiped out about three-quarters of the human population. I'm not really an extremist.
But why are we wasting resources and manpower and money on something that is UNIVERSALLY ANNOYING? I don't get it. I just. Don't. Get it. Hey, I hear we can mass-produce botulism and gonorrhea now, too! Why aren't we doing that? C'mon, it'll be fun.
I'm a reasonable person. Really, I am. All I ask is that if I PAY YOU MONEY for something, you package it in something that does not require the application of a FUCKING MACHETE to get to said purchase.
Or at least that the machete come included, sorta like batteries.
Of course, they'd probably seal the machete away in goddamned plastic, too.
Someone explain it to me. EXPLAIN TO ME why the hell companies feel compelled to package their goods in that heavy-duty plastic packaging that is hermetically sealed, inflexible as lead, able to withstand the assault of anything short of a flamethrower, and requires fifteen to twenty minutes' application of the largest, sturdiest pair of scissors in your house to actually get to the item you have purchased. Generally, wounding yourself in the process, because the edge of the stuff is SHARP AS SHIT when you've actually managed to cut through it.
Every time I have to hack my way into one of these packages, I renew my resolve to track down the person responsible for this idea and shoot him in the head fifty times. Or better yet, lock him in a room filled with canteens of water and dried rations to sustain him... all of them SEALED AWAY IN THE DAMN PLASTIC. I would not give him scissors. A pocket-knife, maybe. It would prolong his suffering.
I mean, honestly, people. In a world where we're polluting the air, the water, and the land, do we really need to be churning out this crap? The packaging probably costs more than the product, it certainly takes up more landfill space, and here's the real kicker: EVERYONE HATES IT.
Now, I consider myself a fairly understanding environmentalist. I get the fact that we don't really have much of a case for telling people they can't cut down the rain forests, when they're doing it because if they don't, their family will starve. I appreciate that a lot of the eutrophication of our waters is because we're dumping fertilizer into the soil to support our agriculture, and that we're exporting food that keeps other people alive. I'll stand behind the mass-production of plastics for syringes and hospital tubes and things that keep our medical system going. And, hey--you don't see me out there trying to commit mass genocide, even though the best possible thing that could happen to the planet, realistically, is if we wiped out about three-quarters of the human population. I'm not really an extremist.
But why are we wasting resources and manpower and money on something that is UNIVERSALLY ANNOYING? I don't get it. I just. Don't. Get it. Hey, I hear we can mass-produce botulism and gonorrhea now, too! Why aren't we doing that? C'mon, it'll be fun.
I'm a reasonable person. Really, I am. All I ask is that if I PAY YOU MONEY for something, you package it in something that does not require the application of a FUCKING MACHETE to get to said purchase.
Or at least that the machete come included, sorta like batteries.
Of course, they'd probably seal the machete away in goddamned plastic, too.
