Otters: 2 Humans: 0

I don't usually post links to news stories on my livejournal - because if people care, they can go read the news as easily as I can. But this really tripped me out: It seems that U.S. Fish and Wildlife has been fighting an ongoing battle with sea otters, trying to keep them out of an area of the coast to preserve the shellfishing for humans.

Guess how well it's been working for them?

Yeah.

The otters laugh at you, USFWS. And they do it cutely, so you can't really be mad!

Now it seems Fish and Wildlife has decided: The otters win. They're giving up.

Hee.

Score one for cute animals!

"And what are you?"
"I'm an otter."
"And what do you do?"
"I swim on my back, and do cute little human things with my hands!"
"...You're free to go."

~Denis Leary, No Cure for Cancer

Roll for disbelief.

Not happening.

Not fucking happening.

This IS SO NOT HAPPENING TO ME.

So. I giddily drive to GameStop today, and pick up my copy of Alter Code F, along with the strategy guide.

The guide is shiny, full of awesome art ... and lists Zed's attacks under a small box in 'Characters.' Hmmm. Promising! I am well-pleased. Elmina is front and center on the top of the game disc. I am ecstatic.

I know I will probably not have time to play today, but on the way home, I promise myself I'll watch the opening before I settle in to finish schoolwork and take care of animals. So I gleefully rush up to my room and pop the disc in.

And my PS2?

REFUSES TO PLAY IT.

REFUSES.

I get a Disc Read Error. Every time. It will play any other game disc I ask of it. But this one? Denied.

WHAT HAVE I DONE THAT MAKES ME SUCH A TERRIBLE PERSON I AM DENIED ALTER CODE F?!?

I shake my fist at the sky. Like benma, I am FULL OF HATE.

My PS2 has been slowly dying for a while now, and refuses to read some DVDs, so I suspect it's the console that's the problem, rather than the disc. Waffling over whether I try exchanging the disc, or just bite the bullet and replace the damned system.

Either way, I get no Alter Code F today. Not even the opening.

Someone get me a gun and Kevin J. Anderson. I need to kill something.