Reality TV just got weirder ... ... a LOT weirder.

I dreamed last night that I was on a reality TV show.

Only - wait for it - the way they got contestants was that they kidnapped some random guy off the street at gunpoint. I was said random guy.

As caltan would say... but, wait. There's more!

Said random guy - AKA my dream self - was Mickey Mouse.

Need I go on, or are we surreal enough? Oh, no, let's do go on.

I was taken to a Truman-show-esque ginormous studio where the filming would be done, and basically the object of the game is this: Kidnapped guy is to find his True Love from among the women living in this microcosmic town. Oh, yeah. And all the men there are, in turn, trying to kill you.

Fortunately, there are a variety of magic hats that give you special powers, like the ability to run really fast, or blow up your opponents. These hats became pretty important when faced with a homicidal bald guy (something I distinctly remember occurring).

At some point I realized that I needed to rescue Minnie, because she didn't much want to be there, either. Then we could get married and grow old together. (Future flash, in my dream, of Mickey and Minnie all old and shriveled and looking very dried-out-mummyish, lying face-to-face on the ground as they died. Yeah, I know. I have issues.)

I think we were pretty close to escaping, too, when I woke up.

I had the hat with the ultimate powers, you see.

Back off, Freud.